Mail Theft.

It’s no secret that when I found out I was pregnant this time around, I took a truckload of HPT’s.

For some reason, I was in straight up denial.

After the sight of twenty different double lines and a digital “pregnant” display finally sunk in, I decided to give the POAS marathon a rest.

Until I found a coupon for a box of E.P.T.’s

I had never taken a blue dye, plus/minus pregnancy test before and I was starting to hear via the blogosphere that they were highly unreliable because the blue dye tends to transfer into places that it sometimes shouldn’t, which can lead to faint false positives.

I was tempted to try it out.

Then I found a coupon for a free pregnancy keepsake gift from E.P.T. if I sent in a proof of purchase.

I actually save my positive tests for scrapbooking purposes and even though I always cut off the urine-soaked wick, my husband still thinks it’s gross.

I hardly ever care what he thinks though.

The promise of a pretty purple pouch sealed the deal.

I bought a box of 2 tests, hoping that I could convince my husband to take the extra one to see if he could get a false positive. Not surprisingly, he declined. The guy is seriously no fun.

I took one, got the unmistakable plus sign, and then I sent off the receipt and waited for my free gift.

I waited. And waited. And waited.

Last weekend, it finally found its way to my mailbox.


copyright - suburban princess diaries

I was pretty excited. Until I opened it up and saw this:

copyright -suburban princess diaries

Yep. Some creep stole my pee-stick pouch. Ripped it right out of the cardboard mailer. Who the hell would do that?

People suck.

I am really against stealing. I am against anything that I wouldn’t like done to me and that is why I never touch anything that is not mine. That said, I was pissed.

Some stupid jerk stole MY pee-stick pouch.

My husband, being the clear, level-headed, reasonable one in our relationship, suggested that I call E.P.T. and ask them to send me another. I didn’t really see the point, and I figured that they would tell me that there was nothing they could do because it happened in the mail, but I called anyway.

Turns out, I didn’t give the nice people at E.P.T. enough credit.

I explained what happened and the lady I spoke with told me that they could not send me another one.

Boo. Now I will never have a pretty purple pee-stick pouch of my own.

However, she did explain that she could send me a refund for the price of the pregnancy tests, though.

That made me feel a little bit better.

But…I still really want my pouch back.

So, if any of you run into my pee-stick pouch thief out on the street, please feel free to give them an ass-kicking on my behalf.

And if you find the pouch, don’t mail it to me. It’s obviously not safe.

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