Skinny Little (Pregnant!) Bitch


Update 6/2011: This post is now part of Rockin’ the Bump sponsored by Things I Can’t Say.





I have to admit, even though I have been absolutely miserable with this pregnancy, I have had one thing to gloat about. I am the skinny pregnant chick. It used to be just a myth that such a creature exists, but then Angelina Jolie and Nicole Richie started waddling around Tinseltown with baby bellies protruding from their stick-thin frames. Alas, the skinny pregnant chick was real. Well, at least as real as Hollywood.

copyright-suburban princess diaries
The proof is in the picture: This is me 12 days before giving birth to Bronx.

Ah, but it is real. While I am no anerexic-prego, I have managed to stay surprisingly slim.
The best part about this? I haven't had to go near maternity clothes. At 8 months pregnant, I am wearing a size 3 in Hollister shorts. Not stretchy gym shorts either. Regular shorts. And I still have extra room in them. I know how absurd this is because when the sales girl helped me find them she thought that I was insane to ask for such a size. Imagine her surprise when I walked out of the fitting room and went straight to the rack to grab three more pairs in other colors. I'm sure that she, like a ton of other regular-sized women in America, hate me.

I guess I was in pregnancy delusion for awhile. I didn't realize that I was the Skinny Pregnant Chick (or S.P.C.) until just a few short weeks ago. Sure, I got a bit of a clue after the Hollister incident. But even after that, I still felt like I was huge. An extra nineteen pounds on anybody feels huge.

Little did I know what real pregnant people looked like. Up until now, my only real references for this sort of thing were straight out of celebrity magazines. So now we're back to those images of Nicole Richie.

Ah, then came Kamryn's Sibling Class at the hospital.

There I was, for the first time in my life, in a room with women who were just as pregnant or more pregnant than I was. Looking around the room, I slowly began to notice that I was the smallest one there. By a landslide.

That day, I finally realized why maternity clothes don't fit me right. Most pregnant people gain weight everywhere, not just in their bellies. And now I don't feel so jealous of those women who brag about never having morning sickness or any of the other annoying issues that I've had to deal with during pregnancy. I bet none of them could fit into a size small in their last trimester.

I hope this gives all of you girls out there who are thinking about having a baby, but are letting your vanity get in the way, worried that it will wreak havoc on your body, a tiny glimmer of hope.

If that doesn't help, try and remember this:
NOBODY looks good during or after labor. Trust me, you won't care.
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